I Can Say Hard Things

Dear Self,
I can say hard things.  I can do hard things.  I can achieve whatever I want, I can be whoever I want.  I have that freedom and that blessing and that right.  YOU have that right.  We do.  So why do you and I choose to be silent?  Why do we choose to be defeated by life's obstacles?  Enough of that!  Move on and up!  March forward!  And as our friend Walt says, just "Keep moving forward!"  You got this, girl.  WE got this.  See you at the finish line.
Love, Me

I wrote this letter to myself in response to a lot of life challenges.  It was really a personal anti-depression siren that I ring when I'm not sure why the hell I feel a little low or sorry for myself.  I somehow always seem to pull myself up by my bootstraps and figure out solutions to whatever scenario I'm in.  The challenges I have faced are yet to defeat me, so I need self-talks like this one just to snap myself back to get-over-yourself ville.  We all have heard "I can do hard things."  A solid saying.  A great mantra for self-motivation and empowerment.  I use it often and 100% agree.  We all are completely capable of doing hard things.

That said, life can really suck too.  There are a LOT of hard things.  And as a good friend recently put it, some people don't even have any freaking "boot straps" to pull themselves up by in the first place.  So is my attitude entitled?  Is my belief that I can be whatever I want just...indulgence?  To a point, maybe.  I would like to live in a world where that truly was true for everyone.  In an ideological sense, I don't THINK I'm just self-obsessed because I really would like EVERYONE to be able to be what they want, and live where they want, and do what they want.  So long as it isn't hurting anyone else.  I think we're army crawling toward this idyllic existence--every generation a few steps better than the last.  And yet, when 3 year olds are drowning on Grecian beaches and trans teens are committing suicide in Kansas and black churchgoers are maliciously shot, its hard to believe that anyone can really just be what they want to be.

As far as circumstance, I won some kind of situation lottery where I'm American, white, relatively upper middle class (if that's even still a thing), educated, Christian.  None of this I'm necessarily proud of as I didn't build it or create it, I just happen to be it.  I'm not ashamed persay, but pride denotes a sense of ownership to me...a sense of "Look!  I did this!  Neat, huh?" and I didn't necessarily "do" any of these so much as I was just lucky--and dropped into a circumstance where I am these things.  Regardless, demographically, my exterior checks a lot of "life is friggin sweet and easy" boxes.   I mean, I have a dishwasher.

All this said, I can do hard things.  And my life is pretty friggin sweet compared to a lot of peoples', but...I still do hard things a lot too.  And I need to cut myself a break about that.  Frankly we all need to cut ourselves a break about that.  So if you want to keep reading my inconsequential personal musings, just know that I'll probably talk about hard things I do, or want to do, or don't know how to do.  This does not mean that I don't get it...I know, I have a dishwasher.  So cut me a break.  And cut yourself one too.

P.S. I created a new blog as I needed a greater representation of who I am NOW.  Any curiosity in who I once was you can see my now ancient history blog, here.  Thanks.